Nigel 
December 31st, 2009(This is the tenth article in a series. Click on the ARTICLE SERIES tab above for links to the rest.)
Despite losing my original notes I’ve managed to come up with a list of nine Ps which pretty much cover it:
- Possible,
- Personal,
- Pragmatic,
- Passionate,
- Present tense,
- Positive,
- Precise,
- Posted,
- Process.
Usually this sort of list annoys me as artificial, but it’ll do.
Possible
Assess anything you’re considering making a personal goal. If you really go for it, how likely are you to succeed? As a very loose guideline, if your answer is under 50% then pick a more reasonable goal (which may ultimately serve as a stepping stone to making your original choice feasible).
It’s worth taking into account your talents, level of education, physical and mental health, support systems (eg friends), interests, motivation, and age. I’m not good at learning raw facts, which is one reason I found foreign languages so tough at school. Now I’m older it’s even harder to memorise stuff. It would be really nice to speak fluent French, but setting myself the target of learning French to that level would be silly. Instead I take a phrase book, dictionary, and the remnants of what I learned at school.
Frankland's Green Crack, Almscliffe Crag, just coming up to the tricky bit. In my 30s I was running most days and using weights, and still had trouble on this route. Now I'm 60 it would be absurd to set myself the target of leading that route again. I'll stick with the easier stuff.
Personal
Aim for things you want to achieve. As a teacher I was often tempted to try imposing targets that students didn’t want. I might know that some aspects of life are easier if you get a good grade in Maths, but not everyone shares my personal aspirations and interests. If your Dad is a successful businessman who is hoping you’ll one day take over, and if you don’t like Maths, then maybe you don’t need to get to University to achieve your main goal of becoming able to run the business well. On the other hand, if Dad is determined you will take over but the very idea makes you slightly sick….
Targets you set for yourself are likely to be far more powerful than targets someone else sets for you.
Pragmatic
We’re all different. Take your uniqueness into account. Any goals you set need to match with who you are and what you hold important.
I once heard of someone who came up with a way to become a millionaire in a year if he did the right work, and he was correct that most millionaires only became so rich by making themselves very focussed on that goal. He set himself the target and set about achieving it. This required he spend most of his time on the road. He hardly ever saw his wife and children, and when he did he was tired from travel and hard work. Occasionally he’d take one of his children with him for a week or two, but he was out of touch with family life and too focussed on his work. While they were with him he let them eat far too much junk food, which led to arguments with his wife. At the end of the year he had achieved his target. He was a millionaire. But he had lost his wife and family.
Okay, so maybe he was at ease with that result. I wouldn’t be. The process of achieving that kind of goal would not fit with my personal values. It would risk destroying things I hold dear.
That overlaps with this consideration. We need to check that the end result is really what we want and that it fits with who we really are.
Brian Jones was a founder-member of The Rolling Stones. He was with the band through its first six years of success, but according to Mick Jagger could not handle fame and the lifestyle that went with it. In 1968 he left the band with the hope he might be able to return, but died the next year in odd circumstances. Fame is not for everyone, nor is the life of a rock star.
Passionate
What will achieving the goal require you to do? Have you the enthusiasm to do this? If you fancy being a world-famous concert pianist you’re looking at many years of practising at least five hours a day. Does your passion extend that far? Mine wouldn’t. I wanted to relearn the guitar when I retired, but frankly I was never much good at playing it, and these days my enthusiasm no way matches the need to play every day. I dumped that as a target with sadness, but felt more at ease having done so.
Present tense
Goals are best phrased in the present tense, as if they are already achieved.
Apparently a boxing manager spotted someone called Cassius Clay who was showing great promise as a boxer. He asked Clay what his ambition was. “I’d really like to become heavyweight champion of the world.” No, said the manager, with that attitude you’ll never make it. Stop saying “I’d like to become…” and start saying “I am the greatest in the world”.
After Whoopi Goldberg was awarded an Oscar she said that for most of her career she’d been imagining herself accepting the award and holding it to herself with joy.
Visualise yourself already having achieved your target. Feel what it will feel like. Think of yourself as already being that person. (Of course I’m assuming you’ve checked your goal is Possible!)
Positive
Cassius Clay was also making another common mistake. He phrased his ambition in slightly negative terms, which gave him a getout. The manager advised him this was a realistic target, but not an easy one. To achieve it he must remove the “like to” bit.
If becoming fluent with French was a sensible target for me then I should phrase it something like this: “I am becoming fluent in French. I have the ability. I have the desire. I am succeeding.”
Precise
Clay did not aim to become a good boxer. He aimed to be heavyweight world champion. He succeeded. He was also voted sports personality of the century.
Be clear exactly what you’re aiming to achieve.
How will you know when you have arrived?
One of my current targets is to have a book I’ve written published by an established publishing house. That’s clear. I’ll know for certain when I’ve achieved it. I think it is possible, but I’m being realistic by not aiming (yet) for a best seller. Joanne Harris’ agent did place her first novel. It wasn’t all that successful – none of the local book stores stocked it. Her next was slightly more successful. The next two were not published until after her best seller Chocolat. I don’t know if she was aiming for the level of success she achieved. Must ask her. I’m at ease with my current target.
Posted
We need motivation to achieve a target. One source is feedback about our progress, and the more frequent the better. Identify stages along the way, sub-goals you can check off as they are achieved. How can you tell if today you are doing stuff which moves you onwards?
Process
Don’t be conned. Life is about living, not sitting still. Make sure you know what will come after you achieve a target. Enjoy every part of working towards it. Be on a continuing journey in which every scene is valued.
